Let Me Get One Thing Straight

People often times have a hard time realizing who they are and why they are that way. Sometimes people incubate in indecision or confusion for their whole life or for decades before coming to a conclusion that they are a certain way. Sometimes people for fear or whatever never come to the decision. I should know. I incubated for at least 28 1/2 years. The first time I knew that I was in disagreement with the heterosexual norm was when I was in the 6th grade and admitted that I was attracted to a guy on TV. Strange, but from there I ended up dating both men and women (both genders in a serious manner a couple of times at least), found attraction for both (though mostly of the shorter variety, although I dated a few taller people, I find them somewhat intimidating even though I am tall), and made comments about being attracted to male friends. After accepting that I might be bisexual for the last 5 months that I dated my last girlfriend (the most serious one, I seriously considered proposing to her), with nothing to lose I came out 3 months after the break-up. First I came out to my Mom and a few best friends. None where surprised. My friends (well most of them) said that they had known for years and the one who didn't had known for a few months. My Mom had known for quite a while too. The moment when I had an "I think I probably am" was when I was doing a rally for gay rights and started sobbing at the vigil. I also had to come to terms that my sister was going to pride rallies as an ally and I had just started doing rallies and I was sure that something was different. Shortly after that I became more involved in activism. I did everything I could to fly above the radar in work for people of different orientations. I knew that even though I am a bit unusual in my approach, it would work. I have been standing up for those who are gay in numerous ways both at home and in the community. Not that my road has been easy: the people who call me names in the community has gone way up again and I have had to consider the ramifications of what could potentially happen otherwise. People have been accepting overall but I had to leave a faith community for a while when they weren't been accepting and there have been other triggers too. Because of counseling and because of my friends who have stuck up for me all this time, I have genuinely been invested in helping others reach their full potential, straight or not. Along the way there have been several leadership positions open and some sponsors that otherwise might not have been there. It is much easier to be a butterfly in 2014 than 2004. For one thing, it is known about more. People can sometimes still be afraid, but that has been tempered with all the ideas of the news and education. Gay marriage has been in the forefront of debates for years and there has been plenty of education on it. People have gotten past the insipid idea that if gay marriage was allowed, people would be able to marry animals and children. Strange but that was thought to be true when it was first an issue. People are becoming more aware that individuals who they might not expect to be a certain way are and the idea that there is no one right "look or sound" to a gay or bisexual person. I have been bisexual openly for about 2 years. There are people who are bisexual or gay everywhere who aren't open about it, either on Facebook or in reality. There are plenty of professions with gays in them- actors, athletes, activists, musicians, playwrights, writers, politicians, and even accountants. 25% of the world probably is on the gay continuum. For whatever reason, whether fear or something else only 5% choose to be out. I am one of those 5% and proud of it. People are most afraid of what they don't understand and it is this generations opportunity to educate and erase hate.