5 Things I'm Thankful For

1. A loving, compassionate family, extended family, church family, school family, leadership family, and exercise family. They are my rocks, and without them I have no idea where I would be.
2. Having the privilege to be in school and on my own. In a lot of countries, this isn't necessarily attainable by people in my condition and in some they don't even bother to educate them.
3. Having a place to live. This is the second biggest one to my family. There are so many people homeless and they don't know where they are going to stay day-to-day and my heart breaks for them.
4. Having clean clothing and water. Having been to Brazil and Jamaica, I realize sometimes it's the simple things that make me well.
5. I have 4 jobs (school, self-advocacy, Albertson's, and self-direction) and do volunteer things often in the community and at church and I love every second of it! And I think that's a gift as well.

Young Athletes Experience

Sometimes I realize that not only are opportunities out there, but they are a reasonable fit. With my background in volunteering with children, youth, and adolescents and with a lot of it in the category of individuals with differing abilities, the Young Athletes thing was an excellent fit for me. I thoroughly enjoyed working with a high-energy lanky lady who is beautiful inside and out and I thoroughly enjoyed working with the Special Olympics and understanding when kids were having issues (there really weren't many problems though.) Overall, there were many things I loved about it- registration went smoothly, the group picture went well, the camaraderie of Special Olympics that makes it special was there, and the help that was needed was done in a stupendous manner. I thoroughly enjoyed working with the kids and while I was exhausted afterwards, I cleaned up a bit. This experience will help me out in my career and the adaptability was done in a respectful manner with making it easier as well as making it to where they could grasp it. This was an interesting, fun, tiring, enjoyable, and exciting experience and I'm beyond glad to have had it and look forward to using this as ways to keep moving forward.

Seeing The Light At The End Of The Tunnel (Or Not)

I want to be clear: I have dealt with depression for a long time on and off (about 17 years old when I was first dealing with it) and I have dealt with it in good and bad times, in spurts, in highs and lows, and in ways that were so off that I couldn't shake it and thought I couldn't be happy ever again. This is where I was at a month ago to a month and a half ago and there were plenty of events that triggered it. Ultimately the way I knew I was stuck was that no matter what I did (even being with friends or exercising, both which I love), I couldn't shake it. My well-being was so off that I had the support of friends to get me to where I am right now. I am at the point of working myself through this. It is definitely not at all easy, especially when you are balancing school and three jobs (self-direction, self-advocacy, and being a clerk at the front end of a grocery store) and have taken on more hours at all of them. Most telling though, I felt like I wanted to disconnect for a week, which never happens. Once that week was over, I got myself back in the saddle and slowly riding again. It felt better to do things in a way that I am slowly understanding why. The successes have become more magnified and have become bigger and my life is slowly back in order. I have had support with my family and friends looking out for me. Am I out of the woods? Not exactly. Should some of you be concerned? Maybe. Should I get out of it? Definitely. Nothing is forever except unconditional love. And I feel stronger every day because of my support system and I feel like I can maybe, just maybe, understand things more and see a clearer lens. And most importantly: I know I'm not alone.